It’s not enough to respect yourself.  All of us need to be respected by others as well.

When that fails to happen, we are shocked, quite appropriately.

Millions of YouTube watchers were horrified, a few weeks ago, by what they saw happen to a woman named Karen Klein. A video showed a group of middle school students making a shocking attack on this woman’s dignity.

Ms. Klein is a 68-year-old bus monitor for the school district of Greece, New York, a suburb of Rochester.  Her young charges were not indulging in normal mischief: they abused her verbally and even poked at her.

The boys (no girls seem to have been involved) largely focused on Ms Klein’s shape, repeatedly calling her “old ass” and “fat ass,” mixing these terms with other words I cannot use here. Not surprisingly, she was reduced to tears.

This was the treatment handed out to a grandmother who had previously served the community as a school bus driver for over twenty years

Among scholars of aging, abuse of old people has long been recognized as a widespread social evil. It takes various forms, but Ms. Klein’s case provides a rare example of public exposure.

One of the worst aspects of abuse is its power to make elders internalize the insults to their dignity. They blame themselves instead of their abusers. They come to consider themselves inferior.

Old age in itself, without external abuse, makes some people come to doubt their own worth.

In a society that worships money, achievement, and success, it’s sometimes not hard to feel dignity slipping away.

Inevitably, it’s difficult to reform society at large and bring about a change of values that would give our older members a stronger handle on human dignity. But there are small changes in attitude and conduct that could make a difference.

For example, we could stop judging our fellow humans according to size. I reproach myself for occasional irritation with those who are obese. Karen Klein happens to be among them. That, of course, gives no excuse to the boys who mistreated her. But it does remind us that obese people should not have to suffer disrespect from anyone.

We could try to understand what it means to be deaf.  On occasion I feel impatient with friends who have trouble hearing what is being said. In a lively conversational group, they cannot always follow or participate. What could possibly justify my irritation with them?

We could attempt to adapt our own rhythms to the mobility of old people. Though knee problems have limited my own walking abilities, I still find myself tempted to be impatient with my age peers who move very slowly.  When they need help in moving from one place to another, I sometimes feel restless because they are not moving faster.

These are three instances of my own failures to respect the dignity of people who have problems coping with later life. These failures embarrass me. How can someone in the field of aging react like this to the needs of my age peers? Do I perhaps fear what the future may bring for me?

By the way, the story of Karen Klein’s abuse has an ending that happily restores something of her dignity. This breakthrough came about thanks to the inspiration of a Canadian who discovered her plight on television.

This Toronto resident organized a fund drive aimed at giving Ms. Klein a big-time vacation. He proposed a goal of five thousand dollars. At last count more than five hundred thousand has been raised!

Perhaps the great majority cares about the dignity of older people after all.